Who is your most memorable teacher?

"A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops."
--Henry Brooks Adams

This quotation, from well-known American historian and author Henry Brooks Adams, tells us that our teachers can have a major influence on our lives; almost as much--if not more--than our family members and close friends.

Have you ever had a teacher that had a long-lasting effect on you? Did they inspire you to follow a certain course of study? Did they influence your decision to enter into a career that you may not have otherwise considered? Maybe their warmth and encouragement, or their teaching or leadership skills, served as a model to you in how you act with others. Many people can tell wonderful stories about teachers they had, and the lessons they learned from them; lessons not only about the subject being studied, but life lessons as well. Maybe you have such a story, about a teacher who had a positive influence on you. I have such a story, although it may not seem like it at first.

Mr Smith was my social studies teacher in sixth grade. One day, we were talking about occupations. We were talking about the usual occupations, so easily segregated by gender, at least when I was a girl: doctor, nurse, teacher, fireman, policeman, etc. One student, a boy, said that only men can be doctors, and another student, a girl, disagreed. Yet another student piped in, saying, “But men are better at being doctors.”

Mr Smith listened to all this, then he asked us, “Name one thing a women can do better than men.”

The classroom became quiet then; the mumblings of all the students had stopped. Finally, one girl behind me spoke up.

“Cook?” she said, weakly. It sounded more like a question.

Mr Smith looked at the girl and smiled, but it was not a nice smile. He lifted his foot onto his chair in front of him and put his arm on his knee, leaning towards his students. “Who are the best chefs in the world?” he said. “Men. Who are the best cooks in the world? Men.” And then he said something that has stayed with me for all this time…

“Men are better than women at everything.”

* * *

There was a feeling deep inside me when I heard my teacher utter those seven words. It was a feeling that I can remember to this day; a jumble of hurt feelings and embarrassment, and also the sense that what I was hearing was wrong in a very basic way. The voice inside me was telling me that the information my teacher was trying to teach me that day was incorrect. And that, even though he was my teacher, it didn’t mean he was always right. Of course now, as an adult, I know that people in authority do not always do what is right, and that they may have personal or political reasons, or agendas, to try and tell us the things they do.

I have no idea why my sixth grade teacher felt compelled to tell his students that “men are better than women at everything”. When I think about the incident now (which isn’t often) I might ask myself “Hmmm, did he have a rocky marriage?” But more often, I will simply dismiss his speech as a bit of unprofessionalism; he probably didn’t think what he was saying was such a big deal. But to me, an impressionable 11-year-old girl, the impact was profound. In an instant I knew he was wrong to have said it. It my heart I knew it wasn’t true. I also knew that my teacher lost my respect that day.

That sixth grade teacher taught me an important life lesson, that’s for sure. He taught me that I do not have to accept the idea that women cannot do things as well as men. I have told this to my two daughters, and even though they are only 5 years old and 2 years old, they know they can grow up to be astronauts, doctors, dancers…whatever they want to be.

I don’t automatically believe what I am told by people in influential positions, either. And even though my oldest daughter is only five-years-old, I have already told her more than once to “question authority” (except my own parental authority, of course!). She knows she should listen to what people have to say, of course, but then she needs to think about things and decide for herself. Maybe she is the only child in her class who knows what that means. It makes me very proud.

I have Mr Smith, my inadvertent “most memorable teacher”, to thank for that.